E33: What's Your Perfect Day? with Tim Church

Tim Church is a well-known and respected personal trainer, and he’s also the person I talked to right before I left my career in television news. He asked me one question that helped me take the leap of faith that changed my life.

Tim really listens to his clients. He also believes movement is medicine. It's critical to our physical, mental and emotional health. It helps us think clearly, be creative, make decisions, and show up fully for our lives.

This episode is for you if:

• You have a challenging relationship with exercise

• You want to feel better and more like yourself again

• You're in the midst of a transition and wondering what's next?

Links and Resources:

Contact Tim Church: 

website: definingmomentfitness.com 

call/text: 843-303-3488

Get Angie's Book: Girl in the Spotlight — available in print and audio 

Subscribe to Angie's weekly letter Hello Friday

Instagram: @angiemizzell

Transcript

Copy Transcript Copied

SPEAKER_00 0:21

We are at Barnes and Noble. And I'm telling you that I think I want to quit my job. And I remember that feeling so scary to say out loud because my identity was so wrapped up in being a television news anchor. But then you asked me an important question. And you said, What's your perfect day?

SPEAKER_01 0:42

That specifically I do remember. What would the perfect day look like? What would you do? When would you wake up? Kind of paint that picture for me.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

I realized at that time a perfect day would just be a day where I had room to breathe.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

You don't have a lot of the grand stories like yours of where you have this massive change and it becomes a book. But it should be everybody's book because I see that massive change when they start exercising and then they start showing up in a better space. They're the same person, they're just a better version of themselves. And exercise unlocks that kind of cage that they they're in when they get so burnt out, when they get so caught up in that day-to-day grind.

SPEAKER_00 1:24

Hi, it's Angie Mazell, and welcome to More Like You. I'm so excited about my guest today. Tim Church is a well-known and respected personal trainer here in Charleston. He's also the person I talked to right before I left my career in television news. I'm so happy to talk to Tim today about that moment and the important work he continues to do as a personal trainer. Tim really listens to his clients, and he has a lot of important things to say about movement and why it's so critical to everything, not just our physical health, but our mental and our emotional health, our ability to think clearly, be creative, make decisions, and show up fully for our lives. Even if you have a challenging relationship with exercise, and perhaps especially if you do, this episode is for you. Listen in. Tim, it is so nice to be sitting here having this conversation with you. 22 years ago, you and I had a conversation that literally changed my life. But before we get into all of that, I want you to start by telling everyone who you are and what you do.

SPEAKER_01 2:34

My name's Tim Church. I've been in Charleston now for 30 years doing personal training and everything in the fitness industry, running health clubs, running training departments. And I've had the luxury of traveling a good chunk of the world with the fitness industry as well. You know, so been very fortunate.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

Yes. And that is how I knew you and knew to reach out to you 22 years ago. I just did the math before we hopped on. It was actually this time of year. It was April, it was springtime, and it was right before I left television news and about two years before I had my son Dylan, who just turned 20. So I was like, my goodness. So I think it was 2004. First of all, I think it's amazing that we have maintained a friendship and a connection this long, and that you're still in Charleston doing work you love. Because that's actually how I met you when I was working at Channel 5 at the television station. I'm sure that the gym you were at at the time probably had some advertising sort of agreement or something, but we all worked out at LifeQuest, where you were at the time. And that was the beginning of you introducing me to fitness. And the thing about you, Tim, and anyone who meets you and knows you personally or has worked with you as a training client, your energy is the same and it's very positive. And you really do walk your talk. Health and wellness and your connection to fitness, do you feel like that really plays a part in how you carry yourself throughout your day?

SPEAKER_01 4:19

I'm sure it does. It's not something I think about, though. It's not something that I internalize. It really is who I am. And I think most more importantly, or maybe more evident, is I know I'm gonna have a good time. And that's probably what you picked up on is I'm gonna really enjoy what I do because I love what I do, and that's what shines through. It's probably what you noticed then and still the same now.

SPEAKER_00 4:42

And that is what brought me to having an important conversation with you at a critical time in my life. So I'm gonna take everybody back in time. I knew you from that gym when I worked at Channel 5. A couple of years later, I was at a crossroads in my career. I had literally just left the therapist's office. I was telling her I was so burned out. I did not know what I wanted to do moving forward, but I just knew I was no longer in a good situation for my mental and my just my emotional health. Everything was suffering for a lot of reasons that I detail in my memoir, Girl on the Spotlight. But I leave that therapist appointment and on a whim, I drove to this new gym. I heard on the radio that you were now at this new gym on the Charleston waterfront. And they were like, come meet Tim Church at V Health Club. And I just drove straight to the gym when I left this therapist appointment. I really didn't know what I was doing. Let me back up. I do know what I was doing, but it was all very instant. I remember the therapist asking me, if you could do anything else, what would you do? And I said, I would like to write essays for Skirt Magazine. And I think I would want to be a personal trainer at the gym. And I think she was like, Where did that come from? I was even like, Where did that come from? And I think that I had become so burnt out and I noticed when I would look through Skirt Magazine, I always stopped at the ads for gyms and Pilates studios. And there was just something inside of me that knew I needed to gravitate towards something that made me feel better and some sort of magnetic pull to health and wellness. So I leave this therapist appointment and suddenly I just find myself driving to this new gym and I go in and I'm like, I'm looking for Tim Church. It's possible that V was still being like it wasn't even fully open yet. Like is that it might even be possible that they were still setting it all up. And I was like, I need to see Tim Church. And they said he wasn't here. I left a note for you to call me, and I would say within 15 minutes, you called me. I know you read about this scene in my book, but do you remember anything about that moment?

SPEAKER_01 7:17

I definitely remember the phone call, and then I don't remember what you said on the phone call, but it had a sense of like we just needed to talk. And so I was like, I'm in this area, I'm gonna, I'm I have a little bit of time. And you were like, okay, let's just do it. And so like the stars aligned were as busy as we both were, that we were able to meet up right then.

SPEAKER_00 7:39

That's right.

SPEAKER_01 7:40

Or short shortly after the phone call. It was pretty quick.

SPEAKER_00 7:43

I think that that was just a right place at the right time. And honestly, I I don't remember exactly what I said, but and I really didn't even know what my goal was. I just knew that I needed to have a conversation with you, possibly about a career change. I mean, I knew enough of that, but the fact that you were available right then. So we met for coffee like two hours later. I stopped by my mom's on the way, and then suddenly we are at Barnes and Noble, and I'm telling you that I think I want to quit my job. And I remember that feeling so scary to say out loud because my identity was so wrapped up in being a television news anchor. I really thought you would gasp or something and be like, What? Why would you ever do that? And that was just where my head was at the time. But that wasn't your mindset about it at all. You're like, that doesn't sound crazy to me. And you started telling me about the program that your personal trainers that work for you have to go through. And you just started maybe writing it out on a napkin. Like, this is the training, this is how much trainers make, this is how many clients you would need to match your salary in television. And to be clear, I was not making that much in television for as hard as I was working, but I was working at least 12 hour days, not making that much money. And you were basically saying, if you can get your clientele up, you can have five clients and you could make what you're making in television. And we left that conversation, like we were standing in the parking lot, and I was just like, Thanks a lot. I'll think about it. But then you asked me an important question and you said, What's your perfect day? Do you remember this at all?

SPEAKER_01 9:33

That that specifically I do remember. What would what would the perfect day look like? What would you do? When would you wake up? What's yeah, yeah. Kind of paint that picture for me. I remember that specifically.

SPEAKER_00 9:47

Is that a question you ask people often? Like, is that your go-to life-changing question?

SPEAKER_01 9:55

No, that's the thing. I don't I can't say that there was some script I had, or there was no I truly was there to listen to you. Because I tell you, I tell you what I I'm thinking about now as you're as you're painting that picture back to me, and I'm trying to remember, what I do remember is there was something about you that wants to help other people. That's that's something I knew for sure. I could sense that that you wanted to help other people. And the questions you were asking, it made sense to me. That's why I wasn't aghast because you weren't saying I don't want to help anybody. So it wasn't polar opposite, though in your mind it might have been an opposite, this career that's so different than what was before. To me, it was just a different way of helping people, is the way I perceived it. That's why it didn't seem odd. It did not seem odd to me. And I don't know, I've probably asked that question at some point in my life to somebody else, but it's definitely not something. I don't know why I asked you that question that day.

SPEAKER_00 10:51

One of the things that really had me so burnt out in the path I was on, I did not feel like I was helping people anymore. Something about my work as a journalist had shifted from things that made me feel alive to always on the clock. It was I was covering crime, so it felt sensational. I felt like I was exploiting people with just having to interview people at their worst moments, and I no longer felt like I was really doing anything good. That was just how burnt out I was. I was so at the end of my rope, and I felt like as much as I liked public speaking and being on television, everything that I liked about it was no longer there and I was losing my spark. And so when you said, what's your perfect day? I wrote this in my book, but I couldn't quite imagine at that moment like what would my perfect day be. But I realized, oh, today feels like a perfect day. It is a sunny day. I've met somebody for coffee, I've been able to just be a person. And I think I realized at that time a perfect day would just be a day where I had room to breathe, where I could just be myself and feel comfortable. And I was like, something about this vibe feels perfect to me. So that was an amazing question that just made me think for a second, you know, how do I want to feel more than what do I want to do? It made me feel connected to how I want to feel. And then we say our goodbyes, and then at the last minute, you ask me, actually, Tim, let me, this is actually where my memory's fuzzy. I think you might have recommended this book, Who Moved My Cheese? I did. During when we were inside the Barnes and Noble having our conversation.

SPEAKER_01 12:47

I don't know if it's inside or outside, because you went back in to get it.

SPEAKER_00 12:50

I did.

SPEAKER_01 12:50

All I know is As I left, I saw you go back to the store.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

That's so funny because we were at a bookstore. It didn't occur to me, but at some point in our conversation, you had also said, Have you ever read Who Moved My Cheese? And I'm like, aha, no, that's a funny name for a book. And then you and I say our goodbyes, and I get in the car, and all of a sudden I turn off the ignition and run back in. And it occurred to me, I need to get this book right now. And then I go home and I read the book and I tell this in a lot of talks I give. I open, I'm reading the book, but when I open it to the page, one question across the whole page, the only words on the page that said, What would you do if you weren't afraid? And then suddenly it was all very clear to me. I need to walk away from this path. I need to let go of my fear of change and the unknown because something is calling me into this unknown new life where perfect days, quote unquote, are possible. So then I can't remember. I mean, it could have been a week later, whatever I needed to do to take care of leaving TV and talking to my boss and turning in my notice and all this stuff, which was a whole thing. And then I call you and I'm like, So, Tim, I read the book, I quit my job. What what do I do now?

SPEAKER_01 14:10

Oh my god. I that that I remember like it was yesterday because I remember going, what did I do? That wasn't the way that wasn't the way I thought this was going. And did I did I steer you the wrong way? And you assured me very quickly because you picked up on how shocked that was. You assured me very quickly it wasn't uh it wasn't all me.

SPEAKER_00 14:30

I do remember you saying, I will think again before I recommend a book to you.

SPEAKER_01 14:36

Exactly. Because you're gonna take action very quickly.

SPEAKER_00 14:40

But you had left enough of a door open that there was an opportunity where I knew that I would need to get a certification and figure all of that out to make that work. But you were able to facilitate a meeting with the owner of the health club or one of the managers, and they did have like a front desk position open and they needed people to sell gym memberships and do marketing. So I was, with your help and connection that I had made through you, get a part-time job while I was getting my personal trainer certification. It wasn't like a complete landing, but it was definitely a nice platform to stand on for a moment while I processed like what I had just done. I feel like working at that gym and then getting my certification and having a handful of clients really was the beginning of a lot of healing that I needed. Just to, again, to be in that environment where the sole focus is health and wellness. And I got to work with people in all different capacities as someone giving tours and then as a trainer. And then I had time during my breaks to work out. And as I'm working on the elliptical machine, I started having like story ideas in my head. And it was you and your wife, Denise, and the people at the gym in that transition period that helped me see that I did maybe have a book in me. And then when I finally started working on the book and I went to a writing retreat, that scene where you and I met and you recommended the book and asked me my perfect day was literally one of the first scenes that I wrote. Because that was the turning point where something unlocked in my brain that helped me see sometimes all you need is a shift in perspective to suddenly do this very brave thing, but something had to unlock in my brain where it felt like it was possible. So it's really just wonderful to talk to you now about it. I can't believe we I haven't had you on the podcast sooner, but well, there's a I appreciate that.

SPEAKER_01 16:48

And I I feel fortunate, right? Fortunate. I happen to be at the right place at the right time to be a part of that. I think that way with a lot of clients too, that we as trainers, we get to be a part of many clients' transition. Might not be as big as I'm quitting one whole career and jumping into your front desk and see where this goes. But you get to be a part of those transitions. You said a couple things that resonate with me in the profession itself is like I said, you wanted to help people. And it's an area that when you can take yourself and put all of you into helping another human being, it's amazing how that by itself makes most of your problems go away, at least during that time. When you can focus on other people and truly helping other people, there's so much of that internal garbage dialogue that just disappears. The other thing is that you're all those ideas, that's something that I tell that story every day about how people come in and they get that first assessment or just sit down to, I call it a no-sweat introduction and just the no stress, come in, let's have a conversation. Let's move some puzzle pieces around to see if this is a fit for you. And there's so many times where I have to tell people, and it's obvious to me because I've done this for so long, but it's not obvious to the general community and probably to many of your listeners, is that when you take the time to exercise, there's hormonal responses that we know, we've known forever, that happen and unlock that part of the brain that is super creative. So when you said, I got to exercise and then all those ideas came, that makes total sense to me. And I tell that to people all the time is like, hey, if you want to show up for your family a little bit better, if you want to show up for your boss, for your coworkers, for your spouse, for anybody in a better light, what if I could just give you a little bit of that serotonin, a little bit of that dopamine, or maybe even that feel of love, the oxytocin? All of that I can give you. I just got to get you to move.

unknown 18:50

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 18:50

If I can get you to exercise a little bit before you go out in your day, you're going out in your day, interacting with all of those people in those environments with a chemistry, with a different neurochemistry. And so you are a different person in reality if you just exercise. The challenges it takes sitting down sometimes with somebody like me to say, Hey, I know you're busy. Hey, I know by exercising you're taking away from something else. And in a lot of people's minds, I'm taking away from my kids, away from my boss, away from my spouse by being selfish, right? That's that's the internal dialogue that we have a lot of times with exercise. And if I can sit down and explain to them how those chemicals work in the body, how exercise actually adds more value to all those people that you love, that's what usually gets them over the hump to take that first step to even start exercising. What's beautiful to me is you don't have a lot of the grand stories like yours, where you have this massive change and it becomes a book. But it should be everybody's book because I see that massive change when they start exercising and then they start showing up in a better space. And you can see their personality. They're the same person, they're just a better version of themselves. And exercise unlocks that kind of cage that they're they're in when they get so burnt out, when they get so caught up in that day-to-day grind that isn't the same as when they started whatever it is they were doing.

SPEAKER_00 20:18

Well, and I go back to what I realized when you asked, what's your perfect day? And the only thing I could land on at the time is a day where I feel like I have room to breathe. And that perceived lack of margin has been sort of a cycle I've been in even now. Like even though I took that bold leap leap of faith and that was such a perspective shift, I still deal with that where I feel like I'm on the edge of burning out because and I don't know if this is totally a woman thing, but as a woman, I know we take care of a lot of people and a lot of things. If there's space in my schedule, I'm going to fill it up with something, and it's usually for somebody else. Um, and what I've realized that room to breathe that we want, we actually have to create that. Like leaving a highly stressful job for a job that on the surface may seem less stressful, like working in a gym, you can still be a trainer who has no room to breathe because they've filled up their entire schedule.

SPEAKER_01 21:32

The room to breathe highly happens quite a lot for trainers. Quite a lot.

SPEAKER_00 21:38

Right. And so I think in some ways, I, you know, where I may have romanticized in that moment, I needed to get out of the pressure cooker I was in. I quickly saw that I fill up my schedule, I fill up my time. And if I want room to breathe, I have to create it. There have been moments where I have felt really bad, but I've taken a walk or gone to the gym, and I am always surprised. I feel so much better. Why do I keep forgetting that moving my body makes me feel better? And it it just really does. We we we have negative thoughts about what exercise means that it's going. To hurt, or so many people talk about how they don't enjoy it. But I think it's just that initial hump we have to get like we have to warm up physically and mentally and get our bodies used to it. But how do you encourage people who feel like the idea of moving and making that a priority, just the thought of it, you know, feels like a burden and they have to get over get that initial momentum to even get started.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

Yeah, happens to quite a lot of people. I've been doing it long enough now that I've actually had people admit that they've been in my parking lot and they've not shown up and they've turned around and gone home because of the emotional idea of that's not for them. It's not who they are. And that's what keeps them from doing the thing, right? Is they're they're making up an identity of based on the situation they're in, they make up that that's part of their identity, that they're not an exerciser, that they're not fit, that they're not whatever. And everybody is meant for movement. Everybody. Everybody's an athlete, just at a very different level and different spectrum. And so just a simple walk, like you just mentioned, you didn't say I went and did a marathon to get that thought process going. You just stepped outside and went for a walk. And that's something I have to remind people all the time is each person has their own path that fitness is a part of. And therefore, it's a different exercise, it's a different rhythm, it's a different frequency, number of times a week that they do it, a time of day that fits them best. Because not everybody's a morning person, right? But we all think in terms of we got to do what we heard on the last podcast, we got to do what my friend that's really fit does. And that's why there's a detachment, and that's why it's so hard to commit to something. The other part about commitment, I'd say, is you said it, you have to make that time. For most of us, we let others fill our schedule. And if we don't put that in our schedule, like I've physically put it in my schedule, it says workout time. Oddly enough, I know this might be embarrassing. There's times where I have to put date night in the schedule as well because I can relate to you. I'll fill that schedule if you don't put it in there. And so I don't know if you instead of putting workout time, if it's just called me time, because sometimes it might not be a quote workout, a hit, a lift, or something like that, but it's time that you take and put yourself in a situation that makes you feel better. That's part of everybody's puzzle. They just gotta figure out what it is. If you can't run, don't run. Like if running hurts, why would you why would you run? But people come in all the time and go, I know I should run. I'm like, but why? They're like, I hate running. I'm like, well, that's the last thing you should do. Right. Because it's the it's the fastest way to start something and stop something if it's miserable. But if it has some movement involved in it, it's gonna make a big difference in the way you perceive that decision you're trying to make, those choices or those interactions and how you react to the world for sure.

SPEAKER_00 25:17

Yes. And I, even though exercise has been a part of my life, enough for me to say it's certainly a habit. It is not always consistent and it ebbs and flows. I might go once a week and then I'm, you know, on a good week, I've gone four to five, I've worked out four to five times. But rarely an entire week goes by that I haven't done something and I can always tell the difference when my frequency has reduced. But I have been that person. I've walked into a class and I can see the exercises they have lined up on the board, and I've almost walked out because I just was not in a good head space. I was feeling, you know, just having a bad morning, and I'm like, I don't even think I can deal. But I I didn't leave because I was already in. And something that I have realized over the years is if I give myself permission to start slow, it's like you don't have to push any harder than you want to. Eventually, once you warm up and your blood starts flowing, you naturally start to push yourself more. When I was going through my training certification and working with you at the gym, there was a big emphasis then, and it might still be with you, but functional fitness. So it was all of these movements that truly did feel good because it was like movements you do in everyday life. So I remember that feeling it did feel like a challenge, but it also just felt really good. And where do you find that balance of for exercise to work? What and what does work mean? But so that like your muscles are getting stronger and you have to push yourself a little bit. You can't be phoning it in yet it cannot be a miserable experience, or people are not gonna do it. So I guess if you can combine that thing, the idea of the functional fitness, and how do you encourage and push people to their working just enough so that it has the benefits, but they don't hate it.

SPEAKER_01 27:23

Yes. So that's the seesaw, that's the balancing act with everybody figuring out where that is. I would say this there is a science to it, right? There is a minimum dose to get a result, but it's it depends on the result that you need and you need this week or today. Because what you need this week or today is very different than what you might need in a month from now. So if you said just textbook, if I'm coming in for bone density, I know that we need at least three or four days where your minimum of 20% of your body weight is extra. So if you weigh a hundred pounds and need an extra 20 pounds to have in your hands or your shoulders or something pushing you down to the earth for your body to make a response to that. So that's the science part. But then then you're looking, I have to deal with the person. And I say this a lot of times, it's a lot of times, it's way more about the psychology than it is the physiology, because the physiology is is simple, it's easy. Not to say that there's not a lot of really cool science behind it, but that I can teach anybody the heart and the passion and the care for other people, and that's what you showed. That's why I gravitated towards instantly knowing like you just wanted to do something for people, and this is a great field for it. That's why I was so accepting, right? Is if you have the heart to help other people, the bicep's gonna be where the bicep is for a long time. We can teach that for that same bone density. It might be something where we need the impact. So if I can make your body land on the ground hard enough, I can increase 20% more than body mass by getting you to jump around on an agility ladder or start playing games, hopscotch games. And for there are a lot of people that are like, the gym is not for me, they'll play hopscotch or they'll go hit a tennis ball, right? Where they have to accelerate, stop, change direction, etc. The other. So I take that body mass with acceleration, and now hitting the impact with the feet, I get that increase for bone density. I just have to get the number of days a week. So the individualized part is the difference, and that person that's their functional training, very different from somebody else. I remember like your husband, that I'm I got on some cables and got him to play with some really fun stuff where you're jumping up in the air and twisting and chopping with some weight. And but he had a certain thing in his head that made him come to life when I taught him those things. And so I knew that was his functional training for the moment. Might not be his functional training today, but in that moment, just finding what that is, and I think that's what I love the most is if I listen long enough, I can hear what they need because they tell me and and what they're willing to do and what their functional training is for them specifically today. I think that's really the secret to long training as long as I have is to listen enough to find out the clues to go, this is where you live right now.

SPEAKER_00 30:19

How do you work with people who have chronic pain or some sort of injury or situation in their body that really does affect their ability to move?

SPEAKER_01 30:31

Which is a lot of people. Like you're asking the question, and I'm in my head, I visualize a crowd that all just went like this as you're asking the question. There's a there's a vast spectrum of pain. So there's no one answer for everybody, but I will tell you this exercise is the only thing that crosses every single one of those. And we are better. Movement is medicine for everything we do. Too much or the wrong movement is inflammation. So I'll say it again. Movement is medicine. That's the good. Everything. I don't care if it's psychological, if it's musculoskeletal, it's positive for everything we do. And movement is medicine. Too much of the wrong movement is inflammation. And we want to get the movement without the inflammation. And so that's that seesaw that we're all on. And that's why you got to pick what's right for you, not everybody else. And so, depending on what injury it is, movement makes everybody feel better. It's just the right movement at the right time for that person. And some of those it needs to be under the guidance of, you know, some uh a hospital led or a doctor-led program, thinking like cardiac rehab. Then it could be physical therapy for those that it's a you know, musculoskeletal issue temporarily. And then those that come in, because it's the majority of my clients, they have pain somewhere. And as you know, a lot of my referrals are from doctors and physicians because they trust me, I've been doing it a long time and I've got that relationship with them, they trust me, is I'm getting them just to get them moving so that they feel better. We actually have people that get sent to us prior to surgery. They're like, Tim, if you can just, if we can postpone surgery for three months, you make them stronger, they know they're gonna come out of the surgery healthier and heal faster. And so I guess the short answer to that is there's there's movement for everybody. And that movement for no matter what pain you're in, there's movement for you. And a movement in a very positive way.

SPEAKER_00 32:28

And where you're working now is entirely personal training. How does how does your work, what does your work look like now?

SPEAKER_01 32:37

It is, it's entirely customized training. It's a lot of one-on-one still. And then we also have COVID put a lot of husbands and wives together, which never happened before. So we have a lot of husbands and wives that work out together now. Sometimes they're in two separate spaces, but we're watching both of them. And then we have a few that are groups of four or five people that come in, but we've known them for a while, and so we pair them up. But majority of it is one-on-one. We have people that never come in the studio that were we literally program it and they're in a different countries, and then others that see us once a month, and then we program out and they're doing it on their own, either at their house or another gym, and then those that see us five days a week. So we have a pretty vast variety of clients, but it is all just customized training.

SPEAKER_00 33:24

I do like that you mentioned that too, so people don't have to live near you to get the benefit of um your your training expertise. I want to go back to something that you you said earlier is that and I you might have said it on this podcast or when we were doing the test record yesterday, but a lot of the people that, especially the women you work with, are in some sort of transition. And it may not be a major life transition or but I think the thing I've learned since that major leap of faith is it life is always transition. I mean, it's just nothing but transition all the time. I don't really like change and I don't like having to constantly re-evaluate. Well, who am I now in this season when everything, my routines and things I built my identity around is shifting. But that is so common. What is that interaction, interaction like with women who are going through that? And how are you able to help them? I mean, I guess through showing them how to work out, but also the mentoring you do almost hand in hand to help them feel better in their day, even as so many things feel uncertain.

SPEAKER_01 34:40

Yeah, uncertain. And a lot of times their sense of feeling like it's out of their control as well. So whether it's a transition or the sense that things are unraveling or out of their control, exercise is the anchor for a lot of people. Once they get started, once they create that habit of just moving or creating space for them to be in movement, in motion, allowing that brain and that neurochemistry of the brain to be in the positive, not the downward spiral negative, you can get in a downward or spiral of that negative thing very quickly. Exercise, because of the neurochemistry, exercise puts you in this optimistic part. So if you can imagine, like I got two sides and we we're kind of always navigating left and right of what that positive energy is. Exercise always pushes you towards that side because of the specific hormones that it elicits in the brain. And so that's why if we have an important decision or if I'm under stress, there's something big that's coming up that I feel like I don't have control, go for a walk with no electronics, or even sometimes I can go and have a podcast going on and just having that motion, that blood flow going, so the brain starts to pick up and go, okay, I get to steer it subconsciously to the positive. Those answers come and that calmness comes. And I know that's it's neuroscience, right? The people that study the brain can tell you exactly how it happens. Um, but I find for as you're talking about how many people are in those transitions in life, it's not just a like the job like yours was it was a career that wasn't giving you what you wanted anymore. But you think about uh, and you mentioned moms, motherhood, and the different stages that their kids go through, right? When they're young and how you nurture them is very different than when they're now more uh independent. And then we get teenagers and they're all independent, like you almost never see them. That's very different. That's a transition all of itself. Before you get to a spouse, before you get to if you're working to have a career, that transition alone can devastate a lot of mothers, right? And so exercise is the anchor for that. And I'll tell you another thing, and this is something somebody shared with me is they said, not only with you in teaching exercise, you change at least one generation, but think about that. Every person that you help out and their kids see them anchor themselves with exercise, the odds of those children having that healthy habit go up drastically. He said, So now you're looking at at least two generations. And that one thing completely changed the outlook of how I go, my responsibility for you and the mom or the dad or anybody else, that's where I was like, whoa, that's the power. That's powerful. That's that's to me what exercise really does. And if if I were to tell any trainer, anybody that coming from another news station that may want to jump into personal training, is I would say the ability really is your it's your understanding that you're there to listen and hear how heavy the world is for people, and you have a tool that most people don't have, and that's just exercise. Teach them how you start small, baby step, and and you can move through that. Everybody can start with one or two pounds, right? And I'm using that as an analogy because it doesn't have to be the weight. The short walk turns into a little bit bigger walk. As you said, if you get warmed up, you talk yourself into a little bit more. It's just you have to get yourself started. I I know for me, I've been in the same career and I knew this is what I loved early on. Uh, my wife even says that she's a little jealous that this is something I knew so early and wanted to do, but I still go through plenty of transitions. I'm not in the same studio or same club that you remember or meeting me in. There's always transitions. You know, being able to travel internationally and speak was a transition. But then when that dried up, that's another transition where you set yourself. But exercise is that anchor that can allow you to make those transitions with more confidence and and a much more positive outlook on what your next choice is.

SPEAKER_00 38:52

Yeah, and I just want to restate that because that is so important. It is, on one hand, very amazing to me that, you know, 20 years later I'm talking to the same person. We're in the same town, you're doing the same work, but you are not in the same place and your career has evolved, and you've had to lean into industry changes and gyms and all kinds of things. But staying rooted in what your personal mission is, you know, the it just keeping people connected to movement and how that can help them and and just being a good listener to deal with that psychological part. That's a lesson for all of us too, because you know, as much as we like things to stay the same, they really don't. Um, I I also was thinking about when I was at my crossroads and I came to see you, I was at that point so burnt out that I just needed, I think I was looking for validation and permission to change. But I've also thought about that moment and let's say I was not as burned out and I had been a little more healed with like some emotional things I was going through. I still may have eventually left. But what brought it to a crisis is sort of that um cycling and spinning out that you're kind of talking about that people can really get themselves into because sometimes we are at a fork in the road, and the solution might be make a giant leap of faith. But I always stress, or maybe not, you know, maybe this is just a wave of transition that you need to ride through and not so you stay stuck and don't change, but maybe you just need more of a daily practice of how can I keep myself centered and calm so I can navigate this transition.

SPEAKER_01 40:56

Um we're always in transition, it's rarely pleasant, but it doesn't always have to be as dramatic as like right, and you might not see the job change, you might not see the attire or the physical appearance change or the physical location of where you are change, but you are changing and you're making a choice to change and not sit and wallow in the same space that's making you unhappy. You're making a choice by identifying that and going, I need I need time for me to then kind of rewrite the script. And that's a big change. You can stay in the same job, same career, have a lot of the same people around you, but if you do the work on you, you give yourself space to do the work on you. That's where there's massive change, even where the outside world might not see all those things that have happened internally. And that's what I get excited about because there's nothing better than exercise to help facilitate that.

SPEAKER_00 41:57

Yes, absolutely. What would you say to the person who feels like personal training is out of reach financially or that just feels a little scary to them, but they need to do something to get started. What can people do who are listening to just get started with something?

SPEAKER_01 42:16

Actually, there's so much you can do with zero money. And one of the things, the greatest trainers, I've traveled the world, I've met so many amazing people. I like to say that, you know, I'm that B tier that gets to hang out with all the A tiers. I find myself in the room and I'm not being humble at all, where I am the dumbest one in the room a lot. And so I will tell you that the greatest trainers are a lot like me. They're always open. They will always find time to sit and listen and help somebody. And if you find a professional that can, if if you think, all right, I've not taken that leap to put exercise into my life, I would highly encourage you, whether it's online, whether it's in person, give me a call if you're anywhere in the area and you can sit down where we can, or one of my coaches where you can sit down and just we can listen and go, here's where you can slide it in. Because our world is full of reasons we can't, because we have high repetition that it hasn't happened over the years, right? And I've heard that with a lot of people. Some recently, he said, Tim, I'm gonna be honest with you, I 20 years ago I sat down and focused on work and I didn't get out of that chair. That's why I'm in the physical condition that I'm in. And I was like, that's so brutally honest. But what was great is I could say, where you're at, don't look at these other people because he's got a mutual friend of mine that's in his 50s and he's out playing recreation soccer. So that's not the person you look to to be like, the only way to do it is to be like that person. That's what was happening. So I gave him permission to start with baby steps. And it's amazing how everybody, and this has been three months now, that's just one story of many, where everybody in his life is saying how he's walking better, how he's standing up taller. And it's not, I know those sounds small to a lot of people that are fit and really in great shape, but that's massive for a person who has had a lot of pain and pain because he's not been active, to have others validate that in such a short period of time. And I gave him permission to start small and methodical, which makes me think of George. George came in. Who I worked with probably at V, honestly. And I hadn't seen him in at least 15, if not 20 years. And he came in with a cast on his arm. He's 70 years old, loved to golf, very active. He was an I remember him as an athlete uh 15, 20 years ago. But he came in, had some surgeries, and so he he came in down in the dumps and he said, The last time I had to make a transition, I called you. And he goes, I just knew I had to walk in there. And he didn't call me. Angie, he just walked, he found me, walked in the door. He said, I heard you were here, and I didn't want to waste time leaving a voicemail. So I just walked in because I knew the last time that we made a big change, I was working with you, and therefore I had to come in and just talk to you. And now I didn't have the schedule, so I put them with somebody else. You wouldn't believe he just took a trip to Ireland to golf with his buddies. And this is a guy that didn't think he was going to pick up a golf club again.

SPEAKER_00 45:16

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 45:17

And so those there's so many of those stories, but it's just giving them the space to go, you're just starting in a in a you know, small baby steps right now, and that's okay. Don't judge yourself that you're not doing a marathon, because I don't want you to ever do a marathon. I just want you to take these baby steps, which then gives you the clarity to know what the next step is. I can't tell you how many people that I give that first month of programming with, and then they take off and create their own the rest of the time. Because honestly, if I get them started, there's so much of that like positive energy that they start creating the diets, they start creating the workouts, they start joining these clubs, whether it be tennis or golf or whatever it is, all on their own because their brain chemistry has changed just by getting started. So I'd say to your answer, that's a long-winded way of saying, like, find somebody that's a professional that can that will listen and then just help guide you to that first step. Because if you take that first step, nobody's ever, ever regretted it. Movement is medicine. You just start moving. You you really can't really mess it up if you just start moving. Don't judge yourself. You know, be be kind to yourself and start moving. And when you start moving, those things will start to happen in your body naturally. You won't even recognize yourself if you just get it started. Look, a few months go by and all of a sudden you're not going to recognize your attitude, how you look at the world, how you interact with other people. Um, and other people will notice it even faster than you will.

SPEAKER_00 46:48

That's right. Tim, where can people find you? They listen to this podcast and or they see us on Instagram talking about this. How can people get in touch with you?

SPEAKER_01 47:00

So definingmomentfitness.com. That's that's our studio uh here locally. And then uh that should have my cell number on it as well, which is 843-303-3488. And you know, people people always say this all the time. You give out your number. I'm like, yeah, because there's such a small percentage of people that actually call it.

SPEAKER_02 47:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:21

Believe it or not, there's a small percentage of people that are ready. And when they're ready, they'll they'll call.

SPEAKER_00 47:26

I would say call at your own risk because I called Tim's number once, or he called me, and I but it completely changed my life for sure. But that is amazing, and I can vouch for the fact that that is just who you are. And thank you for making yourself available to people who are ready because you definitely are a good listener, and I'm so glad that you are still doing your good work out here in the world decades later. So thank you for being here today.

SPEAKER_01 47:54

Oh my gosh, thank you. It's always great to talk to you, and we'll definitely chat real soon.

unknown 47:58

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 47:59

I loved this conversation with Tim, and I know you got something out of it. And seriously, if you have a question for Tim, he gave you his phone number. Call him, text him, tell him. You heard him on Angie's podcast. He'll take care of you and he will point you in the right direction. And if you'd like to hear my personal takeaways from our conversation, I'm sharing that in my weekly letter, Hello Friday. It goes out tomorrow. So just go to angiemazelle.substack.com to subscribe.